That seemed the very least I could do.My phone pinged with a text. He was home and waiting. Smiley face. Sunglasses emoji.Oh God.I finished my latte, and strode out. The busy city centre street bubbled with activity, but the turmoil in my guts was all that multiplied tenfold.The three minute walk seemed like three hours. My feet were suddenly buckets of bricks to be dragged along each step with effort. I must have drawn wary glances from passers by as I mutttered my excuse to myself in some weird outdoor rehearsal of my rebuff. "Look, John, I'm sorry, but I cant do this, I'm really sorry to have wasted your time." Oh God, oh God, oh God.There was his street. I turned into it. His number was on the blue door of an old Victorian house converted into 3 or 4 flats. His name was on the buzzer for the ground floor flat.I pressed it. "Hold on, I'll be there,'' came a voice from the intercom."Look, John, I'm sorry, but I cant do this, I'm really sorry to have wasted your time." I kept. He also had two sons in there 40's that came over sometimes. With Rex being gone so much Carl came over a lot for coffee and talk he was always saying how good I looked which made me feel good I had lose weight from 170 down to my natural weight of 129 my breast were still firm am a nice 40d-29-36 and since I had breast feed my girls had nice nipples. Here what be the strange part Carl is black I had never been around black people never friends with any but I had found I liked Carl a lot. As time when on he came over more even brought his sons sometime I always felt some times as they looked at me they were undressing me it felt strange but also good.I sometimes would be siting in church and be thinking about how they had look at me and a warm feeling coming over me. Then one day Rex had left earier I had just got out of shower and had wrap a towel around me and there was a knock on the door it was Carl he said he needed to use the phone his was out and he had a leaking pipe need a.
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